The Support I Have Received

Throughout my life, I have meet people who do not truly support me. They pretend to support me to stroke their ego, hold it over me, and/or to try to get something more out of it, like money. I was recently watching an interview with Karen Civil and she said, “They want you to be good but not great.” This line really resonated with me because I have also come across people like this. They would “encourage” and “support” me until I got to a certain point of greatness. As soon as I hit a certain level, they would be quick to bash me trying to minimize my success and capabilities.

I’m only in my 20’s and I have already meet numerous people who had ill intentions. Their behaviors made me fearful that I could never really rely on other people for support. Anytime people would offer to do me a favor, my immediate response was “What do you want out of this? Never mind I will do it myself” I do not like to ask for help for even the simplest things because some people act like they are doing me great charity or making a great sacrifice. They have made me very cautious of who I seek help from, ask for favors, and truly rely on.

Fortunately, I do have a lot of people who really want the best for me. The ones who truly support me have been challenging my fear. They give me full support and encouragement. And it always feels refreshing and affirming that there are people who actually want the best for me and want me to be best person I can be. Their true support out shines the ill intentions of other people. Their encouraging energy just feels organic and motivates me. Even though I am infamous for going ghost on people, I make sure I show up for my friends to the best of my ability. The support that they give me I make sure if I give it back to them in any way, shape, and form that I can. Our support for each other does not stop after either of us reach a certain point of success, our support continues and magnifies.

Over the past couple of weeks, I have been receiving an immense amount of support from friends, family, and bloggers back-to-back. I am really grateful for the support I receive for my blog, schoolwork, research projects, career aspirations, snapchat posts, and for being my authentic self. Hearing statements like, “I love your blog posts,” “You would be a great therapist,” “You should think about doing x activity, you would be really good at it,” “I look forward to seeing your social media posts,” “I am so proud of you, you are inspirational,” “Do not overwork yourself, relax,” “Keep doing what you are doing,” and other statements really mean the world to me.

Even though I do not seek an excessive amount of external validation, it feels good to know I am in my right place and that other people can support my endeavors over and over again. I never get tired of reading/hearing these messages whether they are one sentence or a whole paragraph, they all are special to me because they are genuine. I have cried multiple times in the last couple of weeks from all the support and love I have been getting. I do not do things for attention so when I do get attention I do not know how to react, I will either say a quick thank you or burst out into tears. I have been trying to figure out an in-between reaction but so far it has been a fail. Anyway, thank you again for the support and love.

Time to Focus on You:

Evaluate your intentions of supporting friends/co-workers/etc. Are you genuinely supporting them, or do you expect something out of it for yourself?

Evaluate the behaviors and possible intentions of those around you. Do they really support you or just claiming to support you?

Photo by Courtney Hedger on Unsplash

21 thoughts on “The Support I Have Received”

  1. I can greatly relate to you. I too feel like I cannot truly rely on others and that true support is very hard to find. I absolutely love your personal story and how you are very thankful and appreciative of all the support you have been able to wonderfully find. Hope to find that same support one day with my own endeavors in what I love and in who I am.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can also really relate to your story. When I was younger I had to find my own way and I was wary of peoples intentions and also unsure of how to respond to genuine compliments, offers of help without strings etc. But God is good and he showed me how allowing others to be genuinely generous blesses and grows them and sometimes I had to just be uncomfortable and allow it so we could both grow. I’m glad you are feeling the love these past few week!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I feel the same way too, it’s amazing when people genuinely tell you are great and can do great things. However, some of us don’t offer the same support to the ones who give us. Let’s also learn to be that support so we have less people giving ‘fake’ support

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m not going to be a better me by making you a lesser you.
    Some people never learn that and they stunt themselves because of it. Building each other up, empowering each other and helping people see the good in themselves is the very best way to find and show the good in you.
    If someone doesn’t do that for you, smile and walk on.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Indeed. Not everyone wants us to succeed. People are worried you will shine brighter than them. It’s important to recognize it in time and not allow their actions or words affect us. It’s good to hear that you have real support if needed.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Hey Nia! I think it’s great that you are finding something that you love to do, and have been finding comfort and support from close ones and fellow bloggers. One thing I wanted to stress though, is at the end of the day the success you accomplish in life should be credited to the support you have for yourself! Because when your focus shifts to how others are responding to your success, it can be a bit discouraging. You’ll see that the people you thought would be there for you aren’t, and honestly that’s just a part of life. Entrepreneurs and freelancer especially grow accustom to being their greatest advocate, that’s why they get so big! I guess in a nut shell, I just want you to know that whether or not people admire your work what matters most is YOUR input at the end of the day. Continue to shine and focus on what life has in store for you ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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